Before marriage and family I lived life as if I did not have a care in the world. I was entrepreneurial and willing to risk a lot for my business. Why not? What did I have to lose? I only had me to worry about and I felt that I could survive living on my savings for quite a while.

I had a theory, my theory was that I had a job in a workplace before, I did not like it very much but if all else were to fail I could get another job. Therefore, I did not see any point worrying about an outcome because the worst thing that could happen wasn’t all that bad.

When I met Joe I was able to maintain my carefree attitude towards work and finances because I still had little to risk. I made money, had companies that wanted to work with me and was able to save even more once we moved in together.

A big whammy hit when I had my first son and all of a sudden I was more cautious about my decisions. I was cautious about what I did, where he was, how I drove, everything that involved his safety was top of mind and as time went on caution crept into my career and my financial decisions, basically everything!

About 6 months after having him I realized that I had changed in many ways, some due to depression and some due to fear. I went from a carefree, lay it on the line, go get what you want entrepreneur to an overly cautious wife and mother with a business.

I felt like there was a tug of war going on inside me, I wanted to continue my business but felt a sense of fear about what it might be doing to my family. I had to do something because I was slowly losing my mind and beginning to stay home a lot more often.

I thought long and hard about caution and decided that moderation was the key; a friend of mine once said, "Everything in moderation, including moderation".

I decided to stop second guessing myself and go with my gut instincts. If I had a concern I decided to wait until I was clear and then move foward. It was a simple solution but seemed to ease my fears and help me to move forward in my business and life.

I decided to show my kids that if you want to do something, make sure that it is what you really want, feel it in the core of who you are and then if you still want it, go for it.

I decided that I would rather be a mom that has tried a lot and succeeded a few times instead of a mom who was afraid to try. My husband was supportive, I am more authentic with my sons, and they see me for who I am; a woman who goes for what she wants and believes in and feels good about it.

Off to make another Mommy Milestone.