Everyday as we walked away from school, AJ and I talked about what he did that day, the center that he worked in, who he sat with at snack time and what he did during large group time. I felt like I had a pretty good handle on what was going on and how he was doing in school. He was able to give me a detailed report down to the side jokes that the teachers made. He told me that Ms. DeDe had eyes on the back of her head and he began telling Boo, “you get what you get and you don’t throw a fit.”

Three weeks of preschool flew by and Friday folders started to come home. Friday folders help the teachers communicate with the parents between conferences.

The folder contained a list of possible skills that a child should obtain and master during preschool. Things like fine motor skills, making friends, following directions, etc. all get an X for satisfactory or a W for working on it. At the bottom of the sheet the teacher can write a note to the parent that is a bit more personal.

I was excited to get the first folder and found that AJ was easily distracted. Well, he is 4 and there are over 20 kids in class so I figured that it was a normal developmental thing and began talking with him about focus. I thought that I could help him understand the expectations of school and that teachers like you to look at them when they are talking.

The next week they noted that he is very creative and can build something out of any object provided. He even made a spaceship out of coat hangers in the dramatic play center. They were pretty impressed and began to see that his style of learning was much more creative than most of the kids in his class. I decided to have a conversation with the teachers and find out what type of learning was most successful in their class.

They noted that they try to accommodate all types of learning but that AJ seemed easily distracted and not listening during large group time. I mentioned to them the types of information that he tells me after class and they quickly decided that he was able to listen and process without watching them or overtly paying attention. They told me that a successful student needs to be able to pay attention by looking at the teacher and showing them that he is paying attention by responding to group questions, hand movements and participating in activities.

That night Joe and I had a long conversation about AJ and how we could help him be more successful in school. He was learning, retaining information and advancing his skill set but he was not paying attention in a way that would help him over the long haul.

I had received a flyer in the mail about a Karate center near school that promoted confidence, focus and other personal skills as a prominent part of their Karate program. Joe and I decided to try their 2 week free trial as an option to develop eye contact and the ability to stay still. He went to the first class and was totally hooked! I was excited about the school as well. They spoke to the kids as people and not just to the parents as a paycheck.

During the first class, they defined focus as 4 different things: focus the mind, focus the eyes, focus the ears and focus the body. They told the kids each form of focus and then practiced them. They would stand in attention pose, look into the instructor’s eyes and count together to 10. If they looked away they had to start over. It only took AJ 2 times of starting over before he got the concept and was able to focus his eyes and count every time. I was impressed, we had been trying to get him to maintain eye contact for a long time and this seemed so simple.

The next thing that the school did was explain their belt system, attitude stripes and discipline awards. The school was focused on the whole child. They expect the parent to work with their child every day, read to them, bring in homework assignments, study sheets, and a list of things that they did to help out without being asked. For every piece of homework, job list or 10 reading sessions they get a red stripe and for Karate related objectives they would get a black stripe.

AJ was so excited to teach his brother, help him, clean for me, do study assignments and learn the school creed that he got his first black stripe and 3 red stripes within a week. He has continued to excel, pays more attention in school and is able to sit still during reading time.

I could not have asked for a better solution to our distraction issue. Not only is he showing that he is listening, he is developing other skills that compliment his creative mind.

There are hundreds of Karate schools around the nation and we went to 2 before we chose. They are all different, focus on different things and relate to the kids differently. If you have a distraction issue, less confident child or want to direct some excess energy, Karate is a great solution. Make sure to research the school and be sure that your child is happy there or it won’t make a profound difference. AJ loves his school and we couldn’t be happier.

Off to make another Mommy Milestone.