Just another day chock full of fun and frolic around here. First, Dylan my 4-year old went to the dentist, which took every ounce of creative cajoling I could muster. But generally he did pretty well, and showed off his knowledge of states and capitals (he knows them all) and the hygienist gushed he must be so FUN to hang out with.
Generally, this is the case; however, she would not have recognized the child who accompanied me on our next stop -- the post office. Dylan was enraged that we were mailing pictures to my folks. He didn't understand we had those pictures at home and these were REPRINTS, not originals. He started yelling, in his menacing 4-year old voice, "Don't mail the Wolf camera (envelope!)! Don't you do it, Mommy!"
I tried to calm him down, patiently explaining the idea behind reprints which he either could not comprehend or simply chose not to understand. It didn’t really matter, I hand the envelope to the postal worker, and Dylan was screaming at me, "I quit this place!" and the guy behind the counter laughed and said he felt that way every day. People near me in line were starting to chuckle.
Frustrated, Dylan then started flailing his two ever-present bath towels "Froggie" and "Blankie" at me and then proceeded to hit me on the butt and started proclaiming, "Little bottom! Little bottom!" at this point the whole post office crowd guffaws (I guess it's better than big a**!) yeah, we're quite the comedians around here.
He then yells again that he "quits this place" and for emphasis screams “I am OUT OF HERE... humph (added for additional emphasis)!" This post office that was bustling 3 minutes ago has paused in its tracks and is watching this spectacle with amusement. As soon as Dylan starts the derriere whacking, people are laughing out loud, some hysterically. Dylan finally starts yelling long enough to draw a breath and follow up with his final directive: "This IS NOT FUNNY!"
Everyone is shooting me sympathetic looks and I am left wondering if 10:30 a.m. is too early to start drinking wine!