I do!

And now I can put bit to board in style with my new hot-pink power drill. (What did you think I meant, you dirty birds?)

With all the home "improvement" we’re in the process of enduring in preparation for Junior’s impending arrival, I figured I may as well get in on all the fun. Dan, while fairly handy for a musician-lawyer-skateboarder, is severely limited by his lack of time (and lack of desire) to actually get those little jobs done. His intentions are good, but after work he’d rather drool over his PDA like the crackberry he is than do my bidding and put together Ikea garbage at 11 pm.

I, on the other hand, lie awake at night mentally itemizing task lists and generally making myself sick with anxiety over absolutely nothing. I worry that we won’t have the baby room painted on time, that the quarter-rounds will never go into our bedroom, that nobody’s ever going to patch that gaping hole in the ceiling where once was a wonky potlight.

Of course I realize that this is just a classic case of transference, wherein my buyer’s remorse regarding having Baby #3 is tidily transmogrified into the far more socially acceptable and personally palatable process known as Nesting. To alleviate my stress, I e-mail Dan 34 times a day with different things for him to do at home, as if he weren’t busy enough helping his very important clients buy diamond mines and burn vast swaths of rainforest. (Kidding... sort of.)

All of which leaves me pretty much on my own, tape measure in tool-belt, taking matters into my own well-manicured hands, trying to make everything juuuuust right for when Baby gets home. (Because, you know, two-day-olds care so much about upgrading our baseboard heaters downstairs.) Sure, I can admit this involves a fair amount of shopping, but also plenty of blood, sweat and tears, too. Once it’s all done, I plan to sit back and relax for 20 seconds, then go straight into labor.

Until then, I leave you with this parting wish... may all your studs be perfectly placed, may your fixtures come hardwired, and may your plumber’s snake be long enough to get the job done. Oh -- and good luck with any home renovations, too.