It has been 5 days since I went through my D&C. I continue to cry at least once a day and just am not feeling like I know how to deal with this. It has been so difficult. My husband tries so hard to understand and to help me deal with this, but I feel like he just doesnt get it. I am not sure how to deal with everything I am feeling. Also, how long has it taken all of you who have dealt with a m/c to feel like you were normal again. I feel so empty inside and I feel like I am completely lost. Any advise?

Thanks for all the support.

 Hey, I am so sorry about your loss. I know it took me a while to get through mine. I was very upset, and you are right, I know my husband cared as much as me, but I just dont think he understood how I was feeling. I just prayed a lot and I know that helped me get through it. Shortly after I found out I was pregnant again, and I didnt even notice because I was still grieving for my loss. I was 3 months along with my son. I feel that God had other plans for my baby and that eventually I accepted it. I hope this helps somewhat. Dont let people tel you that you should be over it by now, because they were apart of you and always be!

Hello Karin,

I am so sorry for your loss. What you are feeling is totally normal. And you are right not that your husband is not a great man , noone is debating that . but speaking from experience my husband is very supportive and tried to be there every waking minute of the day . He could never understand how you feel .... My advice to you is that god has a reason for why everything happens... i 'm not in any way saying that god caused this to happen ..no i'm not saying that at all... It took me a long..long time to realize this. Just pray everyday for strength and remeber that we need to thank god for even those things that are negative that we may not understand.... i dont know how religious you are if at all .... but these things helped me..............m/c 8/04 at 4 weeks  m/c 9/05 at 8wks 6 days. I am 10 weeks pregnant with pregnancy #3 but baby #1....And praying everyday... i wish you the very best .......god Bless..............

Leila

Hi Karen,

I am so sorry for loss also. I know what your going through and like everyone else has said I know how your feeling about your husband. I can say that let your husband in it's the best thing you can do right now don't close him off. Even if he doesn't know how to feel with it either it is best that you do it together. Let him hold you for hours if thats what you need at least he knows that he doing something. It takes awhile to get over it. I would cry everyday for about the first month then I would cry when I would think about all the things I had planned for the baby already. Slowly it gets better. You have to let yourself grieve and do it in your own time. I wish you the best and please stay in touch the best thing you can do is talk to people who know what your going through.

Beth

I am very religious. I have continued to pray daily in hopes that I can get feeling back to normal. Thank you for all your support and advise.

I'm still not over it. I dont know if I ever will be? The first month sucked. I really didnt have support from anyone, dh isn't a talker about ANYTHING. I was very lonely, my friends who did know wouldn't bring it up, they acted like it was nothing and I could just get another. I still think about how far along I would be, I would know the sex, the name, we would have other plans for the spring and not be going to disney. I just wish I knew why it went wrong. I just got the story "it happens" from my doctors. Uh yeah thanks that helps. Anyway I hope you have alot of support I'm sure it will help you out alot. I am going to plant a flower for my baby come spring (which might be june in pa) I'm thinking a bleeding heart bush would be ideal. My heart still hurts from the loss of my baby *hugs*

I'm very sorry to hear about your loss.  I know what your going through. I was almost 12 weeks pregnant when I had a D & C on 2-27-08.  I'm still trying to feel "normal."  I don't cry as easily as I did in the beginning, but I'm still sad.  I believe that the first week is the hardest.  I have to believe that each day it will get a little easier. 

Cindy